it's all about me; relay for life

Who’s idea was this?

breast cancer blog; relay for life; canadian cancer society

Last night I was trying to process Dani’s recent results and the fact that her surgery is now scheduled (this makes it even more real). At the same time a few of us were organizing a way to honour her in a way all the girls could get behind. What better way than participating in Relay for Life*. 

A week or so ago, I received a text from a girlfriend asking if we should put a team together. Wow, why the hell didn’t I think of that?! I actually got angry at myself for not thinking of it.

Me: Great idea. I’m in!!

GF: Unfortunately I don’t have time to organize…

WTF?? Excuse me? You throw it out there but want someone else to do all of the grunt work? I’m no longer angry at myself, I am FUMING at her. I can appreciate that being at home with a little one is a full-time job in itself but you can’t find a few extra minutes to register the team online, go to a captain’s meeting and organize who should bring what the night of?? Or ask your hubs to help you out? Don’t worry, I’ll work my full-time job, take care of Dani’s kids part-time, manage her house and mine, AND organize this event. You just do whatever mommy things you need to do. Please remember I vowed to be brutally honest and to share exactly how I feel through all of this. 

I rant to two other girlfriends who, thank gawd for them, jump in. Stacy and Christa waste no time and take the lead. We have a quick brainstorm on team names and come up with “Walkers4Knockers”. Ya, that’s right. Even in my seething I can come up with some fun shit. Stacy calls Dani and fills her in on the plan to make sure she’s comfortable with it. Not only does she love it but even plans to be there. Aaahhh, ya, OK Dani. How about we wait to see how you’re feeling. Before you know it we’re registered.

I try to sleep it off but my frustration doesn’t go away. I.Am.Pissed. People come out of the wood works in these types of situations and “want to help” but when it actually comes down to doing anything, they just can’t seem to pull the trigger. I don’t want to say anything to Dani because like she needs to listen to my bitching. On the other hand she asked to be “seen as Danielle and not Danielle with cancer.” Before cancer I would bitch my face off about these types of things. Needless to say I start firing off text messages to her.

My bestie, aka the voice of reason, walks me off the ledge and puts things in perspective. I eventually settle down. Sort of. For now though, there are bigger things to worry about: like how the hell am I going to stay up all night??? Seriously. Sheesh.

*Relay For Life is an inspirational, non-competitive, 12-hour overnight fundraising event that brings you and your community together to celebrate life and fight cancer. Relay has a festival-like atmosphere that your family, friends and co-workers can enjoy regardless of age or fitness level!


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